I don't even know what I'm doing. I'm so sorry. The only thing I can assure you of is the fact that I am aware that the elements I used for my blog title don't actually spell what one might think at first glance. Beware of opinion/rant barfs. D:
Do you ever just get the sudden urge to dance? To just jump up for no reason what-so-ever and flail about for like 5 seconds and then return to the computer like nothing happened?
Yeah…. What’s with that.
My parents throw a fit when, if we were going to go eat or go out somewhere or do something, we aren’t all up and out the door before like 10 in the morning. Defiantly if not before 12. No matter what we’re doing, they feel we have to do it early, and by 2 in the afternoon “omg it’s way too late why wouldn’t you get up earlier now we can’t do anything”. We have a whole damn day left still. The day doesn’t END after 12, we can do shit in the afternoon too. I don’t want to get up at 8 in the morning to go eat because that’s too early for me to have to do things. I’m not hungry that early. I stay up late and like to sleep in (I know I suck I am a lazy horrible person), and I can still go do stuff after noon has past. Exceptions would be like if you’re going to Kings Island or somewhere to spend the whole day, or you have to be someone at a specific time like a concert or something, but other than that… You can go whenever you want. Walmart doesn’t say “lol fuck you” once it hits afternoon. Walmart doesn’t care if you get there at midnight. See how accepting it is of people that don’t want to get up early?
Or maybe I’m the only person in the world that doesn’t like to really do things early. Bah
” The world can never know peace because we are creatures born of darkness, and it is the natural cycle for darkness to drag down the light.”
” A picture is only worth a thousand words if there is no character limit.”
” The light that breaks beyond that window is quite obviously the sun.”
” No grave is too shallow as long as you blend up all the body parts right.”
” The most horrific thing you can ever do is rip the page of a brand new book.”
” I don’t want to take a story and retell it, simply putting my own twist on it to make it ‘different’. You can take old shoes and put on brand new laces, but they’ll still smell the same.”
” The thoughts that flood my brain at night are the type of thoughts that pin me down with the very weight of them, thoughts that keep me from sitting up to write them down because the subtlest movement may break the line and I’ll lose them forever, and if I ever do manage it, wonderful words that flowed as freely as a waterfall scatter like roaches at the sigh of the light of my bedside table. They fall away like ashes under the flame of my pen. The glorious light bulb in my mind is dimmed by the commonplace light by my bed, all the thoughts I had suddenly lost, as fleeting as the darkness.”
And then a million other ones that were way too crappy and cheesy and ew. At least more-so than these. D:
Maybe in France, they have American Toast and American Fries.
But it would just be a piece of bread and an unbaked potato.
It’ll hit me at the end of the school year.
It’ll hit me after school is over.
It will hit me after actual graduation.
It will hit me after graduation parties are over.
It will hit me when I start college.
It will hit me once I’m out of college.
It will hit me 10 years from now.
I was waiting, still waiting, for the fact that “hey, I finally graduated High School” to hit me. I found it odd that it never really hit me. This is a big part of my life- the people and surrounding I’ve spent 13 years around is coming to an end. I’ll never see 99% of these people ever again in my life, most likely. I won’t be going back to the same school in the fall like I have every year. I’m free now, I have to step up and take a grasp on my life, I am no longer in the safe just-before-going-out-into-the-world netting that I’d been in up until now. Surely, this has got to hit me sometime, right?
I was thinking about it, and I believe it did “hit me”, it just… Didn’t make as great an impact as I wanted it to. It’s a gentle speed bump I passed over, slowed down by the long school year leading up to it, which made it so little that I didn’t even notice I was past it, long past it. It’s important, yes. But it’s a small ripple on my timeline where I was expecting a giant dent. I’m done with it, and it’s over, and now I’m moving on. I’m going to be going to school again in the Fall too, and it’s a little scary because holey crap college and driving there and back every day (because people worry me when I drive and going 70 right up against a wall and next to a giant semi nearly gives me a panic attack) but it’s another brief netting before I go out into the world. This one’s just going to be a little thinner and a little less protective.
I feel like I might have/be getting off topic so I’m going to just cut off my musing here. Hm…
Have a gif~
Beware: Run on sentences and whatnot may lurk beyond this point as I try to grasp what the heck was going on and throw it all into a couple of paragraphs. o_o;
I had a dream that I was suddenly put in a school play and for some odd reason I had to play a mermaid and I don’t even understand what the story was about really- I think at first I was all “yay just a mermaid” and then two people captured me by throwing pillows on me and apparently they were really heavy because I couldn’t move under them.
Then suddenly we were all friends and Micheal Jackson’s Thriller started playing while I was back stage, and I was still like a mermaid but I had legs that were like… If you took a mermaid’s tail and cut it down the middle so she had legs? Well yeah. That. And everyone that was apparently in the play was dancing to thriller on strange and they were all “omg wear these blue shoes” and I don’t know why, then I was supposed to go dance with the fifty-some people that seemed to be on stage but I didn’t know what I was supposed to do- instead two random friends of mine dragged/pulled me all the way across the stage twice and then it was over.
But instead of going back to the play, we were throwing up acts to go out instead, like we needed things to entertain the crowd with and stall for us while we got ready, but we could never actually get ready and I was panicking because it was going to be a disaster.
I know someone did a magic act and people cheered, and then some chicks did like cheerleader gymnastics moves that were really cool but no one was impressed because they had already done that during the thriller dance and I don’t know why but it was silent and the crowd looked bored so I got more worried. Then there was this random kid that can out with a little swimming pool and ski’s on and he was all “I HAVE A SQUIRREL THAT CAN WATER SKI” and he jumped in the pool and flung his hair around a bit and everyone laughed their asses of because I guess that was hilarious (and then suddenly there were about a million more people watching and the stage was filled with chairs of people sitting there, watching and laughing, and I don’t know where they came from because before it was just a small bleacher full of students sitting in the way back) and then there was a squirrel swimming around in the pool and the kid disappeared and I didn’t know what to do still so I was petting it and making sure it stayed in there and didn’t run off.
And I was still panicked because this was evolving into chaos. I had to run the variety show for school when I was president of Tiger Tails in High School, and that seeped into this dream because I felt like I was the one running it and I had to get everything right because I thought it was hosted by Tiger Tails. Then someone finally/randomly told me it had nothing to do with Tiger Tails so I didn’t need to worry, the Drama Club was supposed to be running it so it was their fault. I still worried because I thought people were going to blame me if it didn’t go right though. Then suddenly my Calculus teacher/one of the two teachers that ran Tiger Tails walked up and she was all happy happy smiles and I was like “OMG MRS SEALS I almost had a panic attack because I though we were running this but we’re not thank goodness” and she just laughed because I had thought that.
Then I woke up.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING DREAMS. I DON’T UNDERSTAND YOU.
” I could watch you for a lifetime,
You’re my favorite movie.
A thousand endings,
You mean everything to me.
I never know what’s coming,
Hope you don’t stop running,
‘Cause I’ll always be waiting…”
Benny Benassi - Cinema