But I’m going to try it anyways- Please note this might be totally confusing and stupid and I’m sorry if it is. My brain is barely awake… Egh. I’m tying things up anyways.
I think I don’t like to be perfectly content for any extended period of time…
I can become happy. Overjoyed. Simply full of glee and I’m just so happy that some people exist and I love everything and I think nothing can get me down.
Then I do something to disrupt these happy thoughts:
I get on tumblr. Or youtube. Or facebook. Or deviantart. Or overall, just something of that sort. And I always happen to be lucky enough to find something upsetting- something about a person(s) making fun of another group/individual, or dissing completely on someone for no reason, or calling out one person based on what others of similar beliefs to theirs do, or people just being horrible or completely insensitive and rude, or people pretending to have some disease or illness and making a joke out of it, or people just… Just, you know? Right? Yeah. BAH. And I just… I just read it, and I get pissed off and feel the need to read more and find out if this is someone being for real and wonder how someone can actually think like that, think it’s okay to do that stuff or be that horrible to some other people, and it gets worse and then I spiral into a deep seeded hatred for humanity and I forget about all of the amazingly nice people there are for a while as I am introduced to some of the lurking but ever present scum of humanity and I just can’t even comprehend why people would say some of the things they do, why we judge each other so much, why we can’t just love each other and accept our differences and be OKAY with it and love ourselves for who we are and love others for who they are and… I… I don’t know. I don’t understand it. I’m sure there are plenty of things about me, that I say or do or whatever that come across wrong, or my opinion is just dumb or comes across to harsh towards some other group as I hope I don’t tend to do that (though perhaps “trolls” and people like this are even considered a group and I am being similar to them by ranting about this and dissing on them, and I guess I’m sorry about that, but at the same time I’m not because I feel they actually deserve it… I’m sure that makes me a hypocrite, but I don’t care.), that people don’t understand, and I say touche, but still… I can’t even. :/
It goes away. I regain some…. Well, I shouldn’t say faith in humanity, but I always get reminders that there are GOOD people out there that are simply amazing and it makes me feel better until I run into more things like what I stated above and the cycle repeats. Huzzah~
What is sleep?